Monday, December 31, 2012

Page Me 2012

2012 was a good year for reading.  Five days in 2013 is looking to be even better!  I'm starting my fourth book.  It's been cold and gray.  What's better than curling up next to the fireplace or snuggling under the covers with a good book?

Here's what I read in 2012:

People of the Book, Geraldine Brooks
I Still Dream About You, Fannie Flagg
The Dry Grass of August, Anna Jean Mayhew
Sarah's Key, Tatiana de Rosnay
The Hunger Games, Suzanne Collins
Catching Fire, Suzanne Collins
Mockingjay, Suzanne Collins
My Life, Starring Dara Falcon, Ann Beattie (I FINALLY finished it after TWO years of it eating space on my nightstand...)
The Giver, Lois Lowry
The Silent Boy, Lois Lowry
Gathering Blue, Lois Lowry
The Shack, Wm. Paul Young
Olive Kitteridge, Elizabeth Strout
The White Queen, Philippa Gregory
Teaching a Stone to Talk, Annie Dillard (Another one that collected dust for far too long.)
Abraham Lincoln: Vampire Hunter, Seth Grahame-Smith
Outlander, Diana Gabaldon
Dragonfly in Amber, Diana Gabaldon
Voyager, Diana Gabaldon
Drums of Autumn, Diana Gabaldon (Yes, yes... I've been sucked in by a series. A long series. With lots of books. Some over a thousand pages. I'll have to take a break soon!)
This Momentary Marriage, John Piper.... wow.
The Fiery Cross, Diana Gabaldon (My least favorite in the series thus far. It took me three months to muddle through. Here's to hoping the next installment is better.)
A Breath of Snow and Ashes, Diana Gabaldon
An Echo in the Bone, Diana Gabaldon (I'm finally finished with this series... until the last book comes out next fall).
Inside Out & Back Again, Thanhha Lai (Beautiful. This is a children's book that won the National Book Award and was a Newbery Honor book. The story of a ten year old Vietnamese girl's exodus to Alabama is told through poems. I highly recommend you put this on your bookshelf to read to children six and older.)
Wicked, Gregory Maguire
The Glass Castle, Jeanette Walls

I have an enormous stack waiting to be read in 2013.  My mom, Miss Noteworthy, RNR, and I went to the used bookstore a couple of days after Christmas and did some serious damage.  It should take us a a few months to make a dent in each of our stacks!

Tuesday, December 11, 2012

Golden Crack Rewind

Because Gnar Fox and Homicidal Kyle need a fix, and I like to make it easy on people.

Behold, the recipe for GOLDEN CRACK.

I hope you and yours are enjoying this Christmas season.

Friday, December 7, 2012

Breaking Promises and Purposeful Mommy Fail is Overrated

It's been a challenging few days.  Bonus doesn't feel like obeying.  He has spent at least twenty hours in his room, supposedly cleaning his room, since Sunday.  His room still looks like a garbage truck backed up and unloaded at the door.

Unfortunately, Bonus has missed out on some fun opportunities in the Christmas vein because of his unwillingness to mind his mommy.  He has promised that he would finish cleaning his room each day since Sunday, and each day he has broken that promise.  Without going into the sordid details, it just hasn't been pretty around here any night this week.

We had a little discussion about the importance of promises. I asked him if I made promises to him that I did not keep. He said, "No."  Next, I asked him how he would feel if I did break a promise to him.  He said, "Bad."  I thought we were getting somewhere.

And then he still did not clean his room yesterday after school.

So, to prove a point or win or I'm-not-sure-why, I decided that I would have to give him a taste of his own medicine.  We has planned to go chase down Santa last night.  He goes down every street in our little hamlet, and he is supposed to come down our street tomorrow night while we are attending Miss Noteworthy's All-District Band concert.  RNR and Bonus were disappointed that they were not going to get to see Santa and collect the candy he throws at the children.  I promised we would go where Santa would be last night.

I broke that promise purposefully when Bonus failed to clean his room after promising to get it done for four days.  When I told him I would not take him to Santa, he said, "You promised."  I then said, "You promised to clean your room."

I now hold the title of "Meanest Mommy in the Whole World" and the word hate was used quite liberally with my name last night.

So, we both got to eat a big spoonful of disappointment last night and neither of us liked it very much.

There is one more chance for Bonus to see Santa on the firetruck tonight.  I looked up his route, and IF Bonus cleans his room we can catch Santa right before we have to leave for the concert.  We talked about the possibility on the way to school today.  I reminded Bonus of the expectation I have of what needs to happen in the hour between the end of school and the beginning of jiu jitsu.  The room MUST be cleaned or no Santa.

Of course, Bonus promised he would do it.  And then he immediately offered his excuse for not doing it all the other days.

Mommy, it's just that cleaning isn't in my blood.

Although that gave me a little giggle, I sense another round of broken promises on the horizon. 

Wednesday, December 5, 2012

Speedy would have wanted it that way...

A month ago we flushed Speedy the goldfish to rest.  Today I was dealt the difficult job of disposing of his personal effects. 

Yeah, yeah....

I let a fish-less fish tank sit in Miss Noteworthy's room for a month.  I kinda forgot about it until I was hanging out in her room with her yesterday.  Bonus came in and asked if he could feed Speedy.  I had to remind him that Speedy had died, and then he got a little teary.

It was time to clean out and remove the tank.

I got right on the job after I dropped the kids at school.  I removed all the water I could, and then, I gingerly picked up the tank off of Miss Noteworthy's chest and carried it into the childrens' bathroom to empty the rest.  Whew! I made it to the vanity with no mishaps!

Speedy's fake plants and rocks were removed and rinsed. The filter, feeder, and thermometer were detached with no damage to the tank, the equipment ,or myself. Things were going swimmingly, and I was brimming with confidence that this cleaning of Speedy's tank would be unlike any of the previous cleanings.

You see, I was still completely dry (other than my hands, of course).  I had managed to avoid splashing myself with the disgusting water.  A first!

As the water was nearly drained, I felt sure I could complete the job without incident, wash my hands, and go on my merry way.

I tipped the edge of the fish tank over the sink to get the last inch or so out quickly, and as I worked I started making a mental list of the tasks I hoped to accomplish today.  Get rhubarb from Central Market, grocery shop, swing by Sam's, vacuum carrot chips out of my car, laundry, find gift boxes, wrap gifts, cook dinner...

The six pounds of gravel shifted unexpectedly, and I was doused with month old dead fish fish-poop water mid yawn.  It may have splashed all over my chest and face, and I may have swallowed reflexively before I fully realized what had just happened.  Since it was the last bit of water from the gravel I knew I had ingested the strongest concentration of fish excrement possible in the whole ten gallons. 

Spit, rinse, spit, rinse.  Brush, rinse, brush, floss, rinse. Mouthwash. Mouthwash. Mouthwash.

I tried to reason with myself.  Afterall, I have swallowed both ocean and lake water innumerable times, and therefore, I have surely swallowed fish poo more times than I can count.  I really couldn't convincemyself.  Somehow, this just seemed a little more disgusting than that, and I began to feel a little nauseous.  


More brushing.  More mouthwash.    

The next time you see me, I may still be a little green around the gills.