Wednesday, November 10, 2010

A Dream Come True... Sort Of

For those of you who don't live in my hood and for those of you who live in my hood but did not see me on the day of Candy Reckoning, this is for you...

Reckless Housewife No. 867-5309

In my alternate reality, this is me.  I jump in the mind portal, and here I am.  Only I have extra piercings and larger tattoos.  And jet black hair with a green swath.  Everytime.  Seriously.  I know this makes some of you giggle.  I really can be quite tough when I want to.  Stop laughing.  Ask my friend Kernsie.  I knocked her out of the race at the local rink because she was in between me and the finish line.  It was sweet.  And she didn't cry or anything; she just made excuses as to why she didn't beat me.  And I made excuses as to why I did not beat the eighteen year old who won ("If she was wearing rentals like me, I would have smoked her and stubbed her out on the curb."  "I'm almost 40; I'll bet she won't be able to skate like me when she is 40." etc., etc., etc.)  I still think they should have a exclusive race for those of us 30+.      

In my reality, driving one hour each way to practice with these girls is not fair to my family.  So, I just have to settle for playing pretend whenever I get an opportunity.  Or wait until they actually quit talking about it and start a league at my rink.  Plus, Mr. Incredible does not really dig this look on me.  He once told me he wouldn't be my friend if I got a tattoo.  He, of course, ate those words.

If any of the others of you who saw me this day would like to send me your picture of me, hugs and kisses would be bountiful.  This one is courtesy of Momma Wolg.  I may just turn it into a fabulously reckless header--Dr. Jekyll and Mr. Hyde style, you know. 

And, yes, the tattoos are finally all gone.  Well, except the one that is a permanent fixture.  And that is a story for another day...


  1. How fun Cindy! I would have never taken you for a roller derby queen! You look awesome! It sounds like it was a blast. I wish I could have been there to see it!